Jan 16 2014

Nailed It Thursday – Double Trouble.

Published by under Appearance Snark

As penance for getting this in a day late, we have a double up (I also conveniently changed polishes today, so there’s that). I have dubbed the first look ‘Princess and the Frog’ 20140114_115839 Two coats of OPI ‘Fiercely Fiona’, followed by one coat of OPI ‘Minnie Style’, finished with OPI Top Coat.  I wasn’t quite sure whether it would look any good, but I actually liked the result.  It was a fun look for something a bit different. Of course, after a week of that I really needed a totally different look.  You can only have so much whimsical fun (and my mood definitely has shifted from ‘fun’, that’s for sure). 20140117_165640‘Starry Night’ is a trite, tacky name, which is about the best my addled mind can come up with. OPI Base Coat, followed by 2 coats of China Glaze ‘So Blue Without You’, one coat of China Glaze ‘Bells Will Be Blinging’, and OPI Top Coat.

Want to buy Everyone raves about it, so I will have to get it and test it out.  Seche Vite is meant to be the bee’s knees in top coats.  If you use it please let me know what you think!

One response so far

Jan 09 2014

Nailed It Thursday

Published by under Appearance Snark

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have noticed I have developed a new obsession: nail polish.  So, in order to give me an excuse to buy more nail polishlegitimize spending money on nail polish… make this worthwhile, I have decided to dedicate Thursdays here on in to the wonderous universe that is all things nail related.

This week, we have my first attempt at something which isn’t a totally boring stock standard colour.  I’ll have to steal the blurry and horrible photo from instagram, since I haven’t got the whole putting polish on thing down well enough yet to have polish hold up well after scrubbing pots and pans. I was hoping to get this written earlier, but that shit ain’t gonna happen I guess.

nailsThis is 2 coats of OPI Pamplona Purple, then 2 coats of OPI Divine Swine, finished with one coat of OPI Top Coat. I’m still working on my glitter application technique, although I like to think I have improved somewhat.  All in all I am quite happy with the look – the colour turned out really nicely, and the large glitters aren’t too overwhelming.  It has held up fairly well considering I was scouring pans today (a surefire way to strip nail polish usually!)  You can see the damage in the image below, although the colour looks slightly screwy because the light in my study is non existent (literally… there’s just a bunch of wires hanging out of the ceiling where the light should be).

20140109_195724[1]Want to buy

This week’s want to buy is definitely The Great Barrier Reef by IndeePolishCo.  Great colour, appears to have a lot of depth, and I love the use of the glitters in this polish.  Plus it’s an Australian made product – always a good thing in my opinion!  As you can see it is also quite reasonably priced.


No responses yet

Oct 01 2013


Published by under Health Snark,Political Snark

The news here is full of talk about the government shutdown you guys are going through.  I find it rather crazy that the thought of better health care access for all can lead to these shenanigans – is this such a horrific thought that it forces government offices to close, cutting access?  Is ‘Obamacare’ so terrible that people depending on money from the government (in various forms) are now anxiously waiting to see whether they will get paid or not?

Come on guys… I’m pretty sure ‘Obamacare’ can’t be that bad.  Hell, it’s not a crazy universal healthcare system (what sort of crazy ass countries would have something that ridiculous?  Oh, right… Australia.  Along with Canada, France, England, Japan, Finland… and a whole bunch of other countries).  I’m not seeing the issue.

It seems to me most of the complaining is coming from those who earn a decent wage.  Apparently, it’s a problem to be paying for the poors to get medical treatment.  Pull yourself up by your bootstraps already, poors!  Get a proper job!  I don’t want to pay for your McDonald’s induced heart attacks!  Seriously… I do not understand.

It seems fairly logical to me:

– Access to health care allows people to see doctors before their medical conditions worsen.  More serious medical conditions are much more expensive to treat.  By treating people early, you might actually save some money.  Funny that.

– Access to health care and basic services means people don’t have to do drastic things to pay for health care. 

– Access to health care means people will take less time off work, saving big business money and increasing productivity.



As a point of interest:

Last year, I spent about $650 on my private health insurance.  I think I might have claimed about $200 of that back on a new pair of glasses.  It would have also covered a few other things like dental, physiotherapy, and a bunch of random stuff, had I used it.

I was also taxed approximately $1300 out of my income to pay for Medicare (our Universal Health Care Scheme).  The Medicare Levy is a percentage of taxable income (1.5%), and low income earners are exempt.  So, the more you earn, the more you pay towards it.  Some might interpret this as ‘paying for the poors’.  I interpret it as paying for a healthy society.  Not to mention the fact that in the last financial year, I would have had about 15 doctors appointments (at somewhere around $45 a pop charged to Medicare), plus I delivered a child (I have no idea how much the hospital would have charged Medicare for that, but I assume it would have been enormous).  My child had 3 doctors appointments (another $45 a go), plus vaccinations (probably about $90 worth?).  I have a sneaking suspicion I came out in front.

7 responses so far

Sep 30 2013

A Place for Everything…

Published by under Uncategorized

Once upon a time, I started a little gaming blog.  I stuck with that for quite a while – basically until I fell out of love with the game I was playing, and started to run out of things to say.

However, I didn’t fall out of love with blogging.  So, I started a general blog about my life, and issues that I thought were important.  Unfortunately, I didn’t really do well with the whole unfocused thing, and so that didn’t work out so well either.

So, finally, I decided I had to start another blog.  One which let me put my life as a mother front and centre.  One which allowed my other blogs to become more focused again, hopefully allowing me to write more productively on all of them.  People can pick and choose what version/s of me they are interested in – the geeky me, the political, social issues focused me, or the mother.  I can (hopefully!) write more easily, and get back into the habit of writing what I like best.


If you do want to read about my geeky adventures, try Destructive Reach.

If you are interested in reading about my adventures in parenting (so far, breastfeeding, not sleeping, cloth nappies, etc) then try Poop and Goop

If you want to read my rantings about… well, anything at this point, stick around here.

No responses yet

Jul 15 2013

The inevitable birth story that everyone wants to share but no one actually wants to read

Published by under Baby Snark

Because everyone always wants to know the gory ins and outs of the whole deal, don’t they? (Funnily enough, I never gave two hoots about birth stories… then I had a child and suddenly they are intriguing!  Mainly because they provide you the opportunity to either hate on those damn bitches who had things easy, or to feel sorry for those poor women who had it more difficult than you did).

Jaxon was ‘due’ on the 4th of May.  Of course, babies very rarely listen to dates arbitrarily assigned to them by doctors, and so I started feeling (incredibly mild) contractions at about 10.30pm on the 28th of April.  I pretty much ignored them and went to sleep (that’s how mild they were – also, anyone who tells you it ‘can’t be a contraction if you can sleep through it’ just hasn’t had mild ones, or never noticed them).  I woke up at 2.30, and realised that a) I could still feel them, and b) they were just painful enough to distract me from sleep.  Probably about as annoying as a bad period pain.

Well, I looked at the time, and thought I’d wait a bit longer just to make sure.  My long suffering partner was meant to drive out to my parent’s house in a couple of days to be with me (he still had to work, and it’s a rather long trip), and I didn’t want to ring him for no reason.  By 7.30, I was fairly confident that they were not going to go away, and I figured it was light enough for him to drive without the risk of taking out a kangaroo or emu (since I knew, regardless of what I said, he’d drive like a maniac).

The day progressed pretty uneventfully.  I tried to sleep, and couldn’t.  I had no car, so I couldn’t really go anywhere, so I just walked around the house in circles.  I didn’t tell my parents what was going on before they went to work, since I didn’t really want them sitting around the house all day worrying.  I never realised just how damn boring being in labour would be.  I tidied up.  I repacked my bag about 10 times (which was utterly pointless, because most of my stuff was in my car, which was still a long way away from where I was).  Eventually my Dad came home, since my partner basically told me I was a moron for not telling anyone who was actually in town what was happening, so I told my parents (seriously… they worked 15 minutes away from home.  I think if anything urgent happened they’d be able to get there reasonably quickly).  Not that Dad was much good – he had a nap, then when he figured my partner would be arriving within the next couple of hours, he went to the pub.

By 6pm, I was (finally!!) in active labour.  I called the hospital, and they told me to not come in until contractions were 3 minutes apart.  I was a bit frustrated, since at this point they were really painful (I’d finally hit the point where I’d stop what I was doing because of the pain… thank goodness I didn’t know what was to come!).  By 8pm they were 3 minutes apart, and stupidly painful (curl up into a ball on the bed pain).  So, we jumped in the car and drove to the hospital…

By the time we got there I was begging for medicated pain relief.  Unfortunately, my idealistic self had booked into the birth centre rather than the delivery suite, which meant a midwife led delivery with limited pain relief options.  My mutterings of ‘Give me the damn epi’ were basically ignored, as per my earlier instructions (argh, what the hell was I thinking??)

Instead, I sat in the bathtub for a while (which was not hot enough to be calming at all, since babies don’t like hot baths), and tried the gas (which was the most useless shit ever created.  Take the edge off the pain my arse. All that happened was I felt sick and my hands and feet went to sleep).  At 10pm I had a morphine shot, which helped a little bit, but mainly just made me drowsy.

Of course, my mother and partner were pretty tired as well, and they managed to sneak a nap.  In the meantime, it got to midnight, I was sitting at 9 and a half centimetres dilated, and there was no sign of improvement from there.  I was exhausted, because my body kept telling me to push, but the midwife kept telling me not to, because I’d cause problems thanks to that stubborn last half centimetre that just didn’t want to budge.  That continued for another 7 hours, before they broke my water for me to try and get things moving along a bit better.

Finally, just before 8am, things decided to progress.  I was able to start pushing.  Unfortunately, I was completely exhausted, and things moved probably a little too slowly.  It only took a little over an hour, but it felt like an eternity of pushing.  I don’t think I was at all prepared for the level of pain that was coming – almost everyone I knew had an epidural well and truly before this point, so I went in with a few misapprehensions (my favourite?  I had been told ‘If you tear, you won’t feel it with everything else that’s going on’.  What a crock!  I don’t think I have ever felt anything so horrible in my life).

Jaxon was finally born on the 30th April, at 9.11 am, weighing 3550 grams and measuring 54cm long.  Two hours later, I was finally all stitched up (which was not a fun ordeal in itself – I had a lot of stitches, and the local anaesthetic wore off before the end… it’s awesome having that part of your anatomy stitched without painkillers!)  Jaxon had some trouble feeding at first, but was finally able to take enough expressed milk that he was able to have a sleep.  The midwives said that I could also sleep during that time, but it never happened, since I had a post partum haemorrhage, which meant I was put on a drip, had a catheter put in, and was poked and prodded and checked constantly.  However, all the crap afterwards is really not that bad, since, y’know, new baby to distract you.



3 responses so far

Jul 08 2013

He is here. In fact, he has been for a while now. Whoops.

Published by under Baby Snark,Family Snark

So, it has been a long time since I have had the chance to actually sit down and write something.  And then, when I did have the time, I had discovered that my hosting had lapsed, and I did not have the money to renew it for a little while (since, y’know, not working and all).


I have obviously given birth to my delightful little man (who is 10 weeks old today, and as bright as a button!)  I’ll post my birth story some time soon, but for today, I thought I’d just pop up a couple of pictures of my beautiful boy.  I’m getting as much mileage out of calling him beautiful as I possibly can before he is old enough to object.


24 hours after he emerged, and looking decidedly grumpy.  Jaxon was a very, very serious little boy.


A crappy looking, tired me.  I think I got about 2 hours sleep between his birth and these photos the next day, and I had not slept in about 36 hours before his birth.  Needless to say, I look like absolute crap.  I still can’t figure out how much of what I felt was happiness, how much was pain, and how much was utter delirium.


I don’t know why, but I find this picture hilarious.  I think this was our first evening out of the hospital, so Jaxon was 3 days old, and  I was attempting to get him to burp.  His little suit was enormous on him (never mind it didn’t even fit him anymore after a month or so… ridiculous!), and he looks slightly annoyed.  I think he knew all along that I had no idea at all what I was doing. You can also see the mess in the background where I absolutely trashed my Mum’s house with all of Jaxon’s stuff.  My goodness, he had a lot of stuff.


And, of course, he has gotten bigger, and funnier, and is more prone to pulling all sorts of faces.  In the last ten weeks I have discovered so many things about myself and parenthood… including things that I always said I would never do, or that would never happen to me:

  • 65% (at a conservative estimate) of my conversations revolve around various bodily substances and their method of expulsion from the body.  I frequently greet the boy with a story about whether Jaxon has done a poo, what it was like, and how much there was of it.  I feel like I should be featured on STFU Parents.
  • I don’t seem to shower as much.  Or get out of my dressing gown as much. 
  • I haven’t had a drink in… oh… 11 months?  Coming up on a year?  And I don’t mind as much as I thought I would (although I’d occasionally give my right hand for a drink)
  • Even though I am breastfeeding, I still want to stab those annoying people who wax lyrical about breastfeeding in the eye.  Breastfeeding, honestly, sucks more often than not.  However, it is cheap, I am broke, and it is good for the baby.  But the pain, the smell, the inconvenience of leaking at the most annoying times, the need to be with your baby all the time… it can be damned tiresome.

Motherhood… at the very least, it should provide a lot of valuable blog fodder!

3 responses so far

Jan 07 2013

Pregnancy and Being a Playboy Playmate are the Exact Same Thing, I Swear…

Published by under Pregnancy Snark

I never realised that being pregnant would involve such a glamorous, sexy lifestyle!  I am pretty sure most of my daily routine is exactly the same as one of those women in the Playboy mansion…

I wake up in the morning, and oil myself up so I’m nice and shiny after my shower.  Nothing like a bit of Bio-oil liberally splashed on to the boobs and belly to make you feel hot!

The hair is then tousled, bunched up, and thrown into what I like to call ‘the sexy messy bun’. Sure, it might be less on the sexy side, and more on the messy side, but that’s ok.   I’m trying!

I then pour myself into the skimpiest outfit I can find (it’s been over 40 degrees here for the last couple weeks, cut me some slack), and prance around the house with my boobs almost popping out of my top.  I’m fairly confident I will soon be using them as pillows, because the damn things just keep on growing.

Of course, said prancing may be a bit wobble-like… probably a lot like a Bunny who got a serious rogering the night before.  It’s OK love, I understand (at the moment, I especially understand the poor dears who get a bit of rough treatment in the back entrance  – haemorrhoids are nature’s way of forcing pregnant women to sympathise with people with sex-induced sore bottoms, since I would imagine it feels much the same!)

I eat much like what I imagine a Playmate does as well – small amounts, because anything larger than a kid size meal doesn’t really sit too well.  I also have lots of water that I manage to inadvertently get all over my clothes – it’s a permanent wet T-shirt contest in this house!

All that is missing is being ordered around by a man in his pyjamas… if I have a son, I am sure my life will be controlled by a male who likes to live in PJ’s and a robe! 

No responses yet

Jan 06 2013

Baby’s Room… Mainly Completed, and I Never Want to Paint Again

Well, I’m rid of the parental units, who have trundled off back home after helping me fix up the baby’s room.  Wasn’t even too difficult a goodbye, since I’ll see them again in a week, then again 2 weeks after that, then yet again a month after that, and finally I’ll stay there for 2 weeks before baby comes.  Lots of parent time… which could be a little exhausting by the end of it all.

Anyway, here’s a peek at the new look.  I’ll get around to taking photos with the furniture in when we finally agree on how to lay it all out.

As a reminder… before (urgh):


And after:


The room looks a bit cleaner (well, it also is empty, which helps) and brighter in the new colours.  Not sure how it shows up on your monitor, but it is a very light green.  The top third of the room always looks more yellow in pictures, which is a little strange, since it is the same as the bottom green, just in quarter strength.


The cupboards look a lot brighter as well, and the whole room just feels less… dark.  Even though it wasn’t a dark room to begin with.


The door is actually decent looking as well with a coat of paint.  Not to mention the fact that we fixed it so it shuts, which is a definite improvement.

One room down… just the rest of the house to go!  I’m sure it’ll be finished some time in the next 10 years…

No responses yet

Dec 27 2012

Bad Housekeeping 101: The State of the Spawn’s Room Pre-Doing Stuff To It

Published by under Housekeeping snark

I was going to start this with a whole bunch of excuses about why the room is in such a state.  Then I thought , stuff it.  It’s a filthy mess at the moment.  And I am putting it on the internet.  And that’s OK.

The baby’s room (I’d call it the nursery, since that is the proper term for it and all, except that for some reason that word freaks me out and makes me think of either

a) Some freaky breast feeding bar where all that happens is constant breast feeding

Shamelessly stolen from http://filmjive.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/a-clockwork-orange-alex-at-the-korova-milk-bar1.jpg

Like this, but worse..

or b) this.

Shamelessly stolen from http://www.uihealthcare.com/depts/medmuseum/galleryexhibits/factsoflife/images/nursery.jpg

Which, frankly, is just a little freaky) is the smallest room in the house, but it is conveniently right next to my bedroom, ensuring that I have to move as little as possible when the darn spawn wakes me up demanding food, nappy changes, or whatever the hell else babies demand nowadays.  I’d feel bad about that, since on one of the many pregnancy forums I read, it’s just not nice to give your baby the smallest room in the house, but, you know, I don’t.  It’s a damn baby, for goodness sakes.  It’s just going to sleep in there and shit like that, and when it gets bigger, it’ll get booted into one of the larger rooms.  And, if we happen to have another child of the same gender, they will share a room until they are teenagers, even though we have enough rooms that they don’t have to.  Because that’s the choice I am making, damn it.

Anyway.  On to the pictures.

Why yes, that IS my new pram!

Right now, the room is more a storage vault for random crap until we figure out where things are going.  This is basically the only room with built in wardrobes, so all our stuff is on those wheelie rack things, which are liberally scattered throughout the house.  These will be going into one of the other spare rooms.

The weird colour scheme (is it a boy?  is it a girl?  Is it just a really awful paint job?) is also going in favour of a light green.  I’d link to the colour, but on my computer at work the other day it looked more like some weird yellow phlegm colour.  As much as I might be a mean mum, I wouldn’t paint the baby’s room the same colour as foul bodily substances.

We (well, mainly me) decided on green because everything will be gender neutral.  We don’t know what we are having (it’s apparently Grade-A Healthy Human, which is all I was ever concerned about), and we don’t want to have to redecorate for later bubs unless absolutely necessary.

Cupboards cupboards everywhere.  Also my ancient Care Bear, another pram part, and the boy's box of crap that I am going to probably throw away while he is away because I am a bad bad person 

The wardrobe doors are a little bit of a worry.  I’d rather have them not painted at all, but I am not sanding them back or replacing them.  We are going to just have these in white and be done with it.

The spectacular view of... a fence.  I might plant a creeper or something on it to make it look nicer, but really, how often will the baby look at the fence...

If you didn’t notice in the above picture, this was one of my favourite things when we purchased the house.  I guess they ordered the wrong size blind or something, and just went “Eh, how about we attach it with two hunks of wood?  That’ll look just fine!” I’ll probably get rid of the blinds, and get some curtains made up.

My ass shelf!  To put my ass on!  How exciting!

I know it’s a mess now, but that’ll be cleaned off and have cushions put on it.  I kinda squee’d a little at this – ever since I was little and hooked on Clarissa Explains It All, I wanted a window I could sit in.  Sure, I’m a little big to fit comfortably now, but the baby will fit when it’s a bit bigger. 

Also, this gives you a really good view of how bad I am at staining floors.  I did this room all by myself (‘Look Ma, no hands!’), and, well, you can tell.  We’ll have a rug in there to keep it warmer in winter, so it’ll be fine…


This, to be honest, is the part that scares me… the ceiling.  For some reason, I just missed the air conditioning vent in there when I cleaned the rest of them, and now I have to beg my Mum to clean it for me when she comes out (it needs a good dose of Exit Mould, and I shouldn’t really be spraying that shit around anymore).  It is filthy.  And yes, the whole house was like this (if not worse) when we got it.  Uuuuuurgh.

Eventually, I’ll replace the fan with one that has a built in light, and then I’ll get rid of the nasty fluoro one that’s in there.  When we have some handy cash (so, you know, never).

Anyway, I’ll keep you posted… my parents get here in a few days, and that is when we start tackling it.  Fun times!

4 responses so far

Dec 24 2012

In More Baby Related News, Because I Apparently Have No Life Now That The Womb Is Occupied…

Published by under Baby Snark,Female Snark

So, um, let’s see what has been happening as of late…

I am currently 21 weeks and 2 days pregnant (leaving me with a whole 18 weeks and 5 days to go, if my baby decides to be considerate like myself and my siblings were and arrive on the scheduled date.  Which, judging by it’s behaviour so far, is unlikely.  Selfish git…)

I know I am this pregnant (to the day!) because I have become one of those damn creepy baby app junkies that I used to quietly ridicule. 

I also seem to post a lot of baby related shit on Facebook. Which I kinda used to ridicule as well.  On the plus side, it’s not often cutsey, and my sister has admonished me more than once for talking about her future niece/nephew/whatever the hell it is going to be in a derogatory manner.  That’s mainly because she isn’t the one getting kicked constantly, or having to give up booze over a birthday, Christmas, New Year, Easter, four weddings (including my sister’s, where I get to be a whale sized Maid of Honour) and Anzac Day.  Yes, I have marked all forthcoming alcohol related occasions with a frowny face on my calendar.  Don’t judge me, I miss my booze, damn it.

I’m giving myself minor heart attacks on a regular basis about totally stupid shit.  What seemed like an easy decision (using cloth nappies rather than disposable) has become a fricking nightmare.  Why are there so many types?  How the hell do I wash these things in my uncooperative front loader?  Do I need more liners?  Do I stock up now, or stock up later?  Do I splurge on the cuter prints? (actually, that’s an easy one. Yes, yes I do.)

Then there is the fact that I keep spending money on baby crap, which means I am not going to be out of most of my debt before I have maternity leave, which means I am royally screwed.  Seriously.  I need to win the lottery already.

I’d put up some of my belly pics, but I’m lazy.  Instead, let me direct you to my Instagram feed, which is entirely composed of belly pics as of late, and will be for the forseeable future.  Eventually, I will collate them all so I can see just how big I have gotten over time.  Probably when I am more near the 35 week or so mark, and time is nearly up.  One can only hope.  The human gestation is stupidly long, I don’t care what anyone says.  We should cut 3 months off this deal and be done with it, even if that does result in more stretch marks. 

In exciting news, it’s Christmas tomorrow, I am on holidays for the next 5 weeks, and I am planning on sitting in my pool for most of that time.

Yay Christmas!

Comments Off

Next »


babies Baking Blogging boyfriend broke Canada cats Compromise dogs drunk facebook Hipstamatic holiday Home Hosting HSC Idiocy insomnia Internet iPhone Kamiko Lazy Lightroom Mess money Moving optimism other guy party photography pregnant relationship Renovations Reports sex sleep Teaching Telstra Travel tweets twitter US venting work WoW